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Married, Are You Ready?

In a few ago, my nephew, Andre, and his wife married, after passing a period of engagement during one year. Andre says that his wife changes her conduct after entering a period of married. “He is very egoist” he said. Due to change of her conduct, hence this makes inharmonious husband and wife couple relationship. Experience of like this also experienced by many couples, even not long they had married then divorced.

During engagement is a period of a real pleases, full of romantika for a couple of a young people which will pass off marriage, where they sign a contract special friendship. This period should need condition as and a real initial step determine in building successful marriage. Why should? If the construction of friendship in this engagement until continued to husband and wife life, hence character, demeanor and habit built in a period of engagement will become sturdy in life of family in later day. Smooth of in a period of nuptials, may colored by quality of development of their relationship during engagement.

Learning from the failure at the time of entering a period of their nuptials, they may not prepare themselves from beginning of build sturdy base during engagement. Period of engagement must be started with harmonious role from both parties, either in personality, and also behavior before stepping on in husband and wife life. Hope always will be able to lessen pressures which will arise in the future to keep house leading to husband and wife happiness.

Only one thing that promised in engagement differs from promised said in nuptials, because promised in engagement able to be canceled, while in nuptials may not, except dissociating by death. Even if in a period of engagement able to be canceled, but in a period of this engagement may not be paltered, because canceling a promised is a thing which is totally inconvenience and become the source of news that is less pleasant to hear. But need to be paid attention that better canceling an engagement promised than continuing up to married level which have many problem, when they have difference of principle that is not possibly to reunited.

Of course before a period of engagement, in the beginning they are awing each other fall in love and hereinafter there are feeling of being intimate among them. When will enter a period of engagement, its better if they have terminated experience “fall in love“. They must pursue “real love” that unites emotion and common sense and entangles hard willingness and requirement discipline of growth of each person.

During period of engagement its better take a long time which sufficiently to be each other more recognizing in so many practical aspects from everyday life, beside intellectual life, physical, mental and spiritual.There are five important things for they are experiencing a period of engagement, which is as follows:Esteem and takes care of honor in each other.

  • Evolving honest and proper attitude.

  • Looks for correspondence and towards aptitude.

  • Has commitment of absolute monogamy.

  • Esteems old fellow authority.

Engagement is not probation of nuptials, however more accurately told as one last step towards nuptials and is a gestation period real crux of nuptials.


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